我們都是一家人-成功收養大小孩之初探性研究

We are family：The exploring research on the mothers who adopt older children successfully.

吳秀峰(Shiu-Fong Wu)

指導教授 ： 鄔佩麗

國立臺灣師範大學/教育學院/教育心理與輔導學系/碩士(2002年)

摘要

本研究以質的研究方法中的訪談導引法，訪問兩位收養大小孩的收養媽媽，試圖藉由瞭解成功收養者的適應歷程，來瞭解收養大小孩家庭的適應歷程、探討收養大小孩家庭適應歷程的影響因素、收養安置後對收養人的影響等，來提供收養人、收養機構、實務工作者與未來的研究者一些參考，協助降低收養中止機率。
本研究的受訪者都是被收養兒童的主要照顧者，開始接觸被收養兒童時，兒童約三歲或三歲以上，且至少有一次的收養終止經驗，但目前其收養關係已經法律裁定，並且與被收養兒童共同生活至少一年以上。
本研究的結果與發現如下：
一、收養大小孩家庭的適應歷程可分為「收養醞釀階段」、「蜜月階段」、「動盪階段」、「穩定階段」四個階段，每個階段都有其特色：
1. 收養醞釀階段：這個階段的特色是都包含收養人對孩子的渴望、經歷不孕的過程而萌生收養念頭、開始接觸收養並建立收養觀念、開始與收養機構聯繫並計畫收養相關事宜。
2. 蜜月階段：特色是漸進式接觸時對孩子有正面且深刻的印象、被收養兒童的表現大都是令收養父母滿意的，也是他們能接受的行為、收養父母都認為孩子很喜歡自己、很能適應這個家、收養父母的親子認同度高於被收養兒童。
3. 動盪階段：特色是被收養兒童出現收養人非預期、不能接受或想要改善的狀況、家庭成員面臨挑戰、家庭成員試圖解決問題。
4. 穩定階段：這個階段的特色是兒童的行為不再是令人難以接受的、彼此對親子關係的認同、新而良好的家庭關係已經成立。
二、在親職行為的部分，這兩個收養家庭的親職角色分工是傳統的，且其親職表現受到原生家庭的影響；在管教態度不一致時，衝突的現場都是太太退讓，衝突的原因包括觀念的不同與權力衝突。
三、收養安置後對收養人的影響，主要包括對自己、對婚姻關係及家庭生活的改變。
1. 對自己的影響：包括作息變的緊湊而忙碌、生活圈的擴展、關注焦點的轉變、生命意義的重新思索。
2. 對婚姻關係的影響：包括夫妻間話題的轉變、婚姻品質的改變。
3. 對家庭生活的影響：包括作息的改變、家庭支出增加、家庭對外關係的改變與家庭氣氛的改變。
四、有關收養家庭對收養的態度，則有下列的發現：
1. 收養家庭與孩子原生家庭的關係：收養人都傾向與孩子的原生家庭保持一定的距離、願意在不影響生活的情形下，配合孩子的原生家庭對聯繫的期待。
2. 在收養家庭處理身世問題的態度上，則分為兒童與收養父母兩部分：被收養的兒童都很清楚自己的身世，他們很在意身世的問題，但面對的方式不同。在收養父母的部分，收養人對兒童都採取坦白與開放的態度，但也會配合兒童態度的變化而調整、對外都是採取對熟人坦白，對不熟者隱瞞的態度。
3. 在收養人的收養觀念上，可以看到不同家庭有不同的收養決策方式，但都有命定的觀念與珍視被收養兒童的觀念。
五、有關收養適應的可能影響因素，也分為四個方面來分析：
1. 在收養適應歷程的部分，包括傳統文化對收養期待的影響、合理的收養期待、對不孕的調適、兒童過去的經驗、因應策略、支持系統的協助、親子關係的認同、家庭關係的融合等。
2. 在親職行為的部分，可看到主要照顧者的親職壓力較大、配偶的支持有助於收養適應、親職行為對親子關係的影響，以及對管教態度的不一致不予處理時，夫妻間的負向感受也就依然存在。
3. 收養安置後的生活變化對收養適應的影響，則是當改變能滿足收養人的需求、個人、夫妻與家庭系統健全有彈性時，有助於收養適應。
4. 在收養態度部分，收養人對孩子生父母的矛盾情結、對兒童處理身世態度的解讀，以及珍視的心態，都有助於收養適應。
最後，依據研究結果也對實務工作者、收養機構與未來的研究方向提出建議，以為參考。

關鍵字

大小孩收養 ； 收養適應 ； 成功收養 ； 收養終止

並列摘要

There are two adoptive mothers who adopted the older child were interviewed with interview guide of qualitative research in this research. The major purpose of this study was trying to understand the process of adjustment of successful adoptions to know the family process of adjustment who adopt older child, the elements what effected it, the impacts to adoptive mothers after placement for providing some references to adoptive parents, the organization of adoption, the practice workers and the future researchers to reduce the probabilities of disruption.
All subjects are the key persons who take care the adoptees, and the adoptees were about three or above three years old and had experienced adoption disruption at least once before they had begun to contact the adoptive parents. Their adoptions are finalization, and the adoptive parents have lived with adoptee at least one year.
The findings in the present study are as follow：
I.There are four stages in the process of adjustment in older child adoption. There are several characteristics on each stage.
A.The adoption brew（warm up） stage：The characteristics on the stage are the desire adoptive parents had to have a child, the experience of infertility which brought up the idea of adoption, and the couple started to contact and built up the concept of adoption, started to contact the organization of adoption and planed for the it.
B.The honey moon stage：The characteristics are the positive and deep impression on the progressing contact, and the behaviors of adopted children was satisfied with adoptive parents, the adoptive parents all thought the child liked them very much and adjusted to the family very well, the identification of parent-child was higher on adoptive parents than adopted child.
C.The wave stage：The characteristics are the behaviors of the adopted children happened to shock adoptive parents or make them want to improve it, the family members are faced with challenges and tried to get over it.
D.The stable stage：The characteristics on this stage are the behaviors of adopted children are no more unacceptable, the identification of parent-child with each other, and they already has the new and wonderful family relationship.
II.On the part of parenting, the division of parenting role in these two adoptive families is traditional, and the parenting influenced by the original family. When the couples had different opinions in parenting, the wives conceded. And the reasons of conflicts are the different ideas and power struggle.
III.The impacts to adoptive mothers after placement includes of the changes to themselves, to their marital relationship and to the family life.
A.The impact of themselves：Including of the schedule is crowded, the expansion of life, the focuses is shifting, and the rethinking of life meaning.
B.The impact of marital relationship：Including of the topics of conversation between the man and the wife was shifting, the changes of the quality of marital relationship.
C.The impact of family life：including the changes of family’s schedule , expenditure’s increase , the change of external relationship and also the change of family’s atmosphere.
IV.We found below adoptive family’s attitudes about adoption：
A.The relationship between adoptive families and original families：They tend to maintain some kind of distance to the original families of the adopted children. But they will meet the expectations from the original family of the adopted children, if that won’t influence their life.
B.What are the attitudes of the adopted children and parents when they face the adopted children’s background? We found that the adopted children all know their background very clearly, and they also care their background. But their attitudes are different when they face this problem. On the other side, the adoptive parents don’t conceal anything from their adopted children, but they will change their attitudes once they found there are some changes in those children’s attitudes. The adoptive parents will be frank with their closed friends, but they won’t talk about it with others.
C.About adoptive concept, although different families have different adoptive decision methods, but we can find that they all think it’s a fate to get the result and they also feel they should cherish the adopted children.
V.I try to analyze the possible factors that affect the adjustment to adoption with four phases as bellow.
A.In the process of adjustment to adoption：Including of the influences traditional culture did to adoption, the reasonable expectations of adoption, the well adjust to infertile, the past experiences of the adopted children, coping strategies , support systems, the identification of parent-child relationship, the harmonious family relationship.
B.In the parenting behaviors of adoptive parents, I fond there is much more pressures the adoptive mothers had who is the key person of taking care of children. Spouse’s supporting will be helpful to the adjustment to adoption. And the bad feeling will last if the couples do nothing to their different opinions in parenting.
C.If the changes of life after placement can meet the adoptive parents, and the systems of individual, couple and family are health and elastic, it would be helpful to the adjustment to adoption.
D.About the attitude to the adoption, I found the adoptive parents had a complex to the original parents of the adopted children, and it would be a factor of the adjustment to the adoption that what’s the reading to the attitudes that the adopted children face to their background and the attitude of cherishing the adopted children.
In the end, I proposed some suggestions to the practice workers, organization of adoption and the future research according to the findings of the study and the discussions with practice workers.

並列關鍵字

older child adoption ； adoption adjustment ； suscessful adoption ； adoption disruption

參考文獻

Brodzinsky, D.M., Schechter, M.D. & Henig, R.M. (1992) Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self. NY: Doubleday.

Barth, R. P. & Berry, M. (1988) Adoption and disruption: rates, risks, and responses. New York: Aldine De Gruyter.

Bean, P. （ed.） (1984) Adoption: essays in social policy, law, and sociology. New York: Tavistock.

Berry, M. & Barth, R. P. (1989) Behavior Problems of Children Adopted When Older. Children and Youth Services, vol. 11, pp.221-238.

Cohen, J. S. & Westhues, A. (1990) Well-functioning families for adoptive and foster children. University of Toronto Press.