同志兒子照顧者如何不／可能？男同志與照顧者交織之生命經驗

本研究從研究者對自己同志與日後照顧父母的擔憂和矛盾為出發點，探究同志兒子照顧失能父母的照顧經驗，瞭解同志兒子的同志身分認同歷程、如何成為照顧者、照顧過程如何理解和適應照顧身分，以及發展出保有同志認同生活實踐的策略。增進性少數在家庭照顧論述的主體性，凸顯男同志照顧者的生命議題。　　本研究以敘述研究方法，呈現同志兒子照顧者的生命故事，依照顧歷程重要的轉捩點，討論同志兒子成為照顧者的成因、個人與照顧生活的取捨、提供的照顧與資源籌用、獲得的照顧者支持、同志身分的再現。　　研究發現同志兒子照顧者依舊受到家庭孝道文化影響，與家庭產生緊密連結，家庭身分及資源較可彈性調整。家庭對同志身分友善程度的不同，會發展出不同稱謂稱呼伴侶或區別居住空間的策略保有同志實踐。照顧工作及特質展現模糊家庭二元性別身分的界線。在現身並受到友善接納的前提，同志兒子的情感支持面向多元，消解照顧壓力和獲得同志身分壓抑的喘息空間。長期照顧與陪伴失能父母，使同志與兒子身分的認同主體再現，多元家庭照顧圖像因著照顧經驗而生。　　同志兒子的照顧歷程是一場發生在家庭內部的同志社會運動，在家庭照顧情境感受到個人同志身分的壓抑，以身體作為抵抗工具，同志友善的人際關係進入照顧情境會形成集體抵抗的力量，最後由外而內再現同志與兒子身分交織認同，創造多元家庭照顧圖像的可能。　　「同志」與「兒子」身分在照顧歷程不可分割，它是家庭照顧動力、家庭成員互動關係、人際關係、性別意識等政治身分互動的重要媒介。現身的主動權由照顧者掌握，提升對現身的敏感度，有助於觀察與拿捏與照顧者的關係互動。

關鍵字

長期照顧；同志兒子；身分認同；現身；再建構

並列摘要

This study starts from the worries and contradictions of the researchers between gay life and caring their parents. Explore the caring experiences of gay sons to their disabled parents. Understand “gay identity process”, “how to become a caregiver”, “how to understand and adapt to be a caregiver”, and “how to develop strategies for maintaining gay identity when caring their parents”. The study accentuates the subjectivity of sexual minorities in family care research, and highlights the life issues of gay caregivers. 　This study presents the life stories of the gay son caregivers with narrative research methods. According to the important turning points during the care periods, the study discussed the reasons “why gay son becomes a caregiver”, “the choices between personal and caring life”, “which caring works they did”, “the caring support”, and “the re-making of their gay identity”. 　The study found out that the gay son caregivers were still influenced by the family filial piety culture and got closely relationship with the family. Their family role and resources can be adjusted more flexibly. The different level of the friendliness in gay family, the gay son caregivers will develop different strategies to maintain their gay life practices, such as using different name calling their partners or separating their living spaces. Both caring works and sexual traits blurred the gender binary in gay families. On the premise of coming out and being treated friendly, gay son caregivers will obtain a multi-emotion support to release the caring stress and have a respite due to suppression. Through in the long caring period for disabled parents, the subjectivity of gay son will be re-made, and creates a multi-family caring image. 　The caring process for gay sons is a social movement that took place within the family. In the family caring situation, gay sons felt the repression of their gay identity at first, and used their body as a tool to against. When gay-friendly interpersonal relationships joined into their caring situation, it will form a collective resistance to fight for the force. Finally, the identity of gay son will be intersected and re-made from input to output, and create a multi-family caring image. 　The identities of "gay" and "son" are inseparable in the caring experiences. It is an important medium for the interaction of political identities such as family caring motivation, family members' interactions, interpersonal relationships, and gender awareness. The caregivers obtain the choice for coming out or not. It’s helpful when we promote our sensitivity to observe and modify the relationship with gay son caregivers.