「如果你愛我，你就會•••」— 揭開台灣暴力婚姻的面紗

“If You Love Me, You Would… ”: The Unveiling of Violent Marriages in Taiwan

陳光霓(Connie Chen)

指導教授 ： 鄔佩麗

國立臺灣師範大學/教育學院/教育心理與輔導學系/碩士(2004年)

摘要

本研究目的在於瞭解所謂婚姻暴力施暴者的觀點看待他的暴力婚姻。並且幫助專業更瞭解從男人的角度看暴力婚姻問題，如何幫助眼前的夫妻。
此研究分為兩個部分，第一個部分是三位參與半結構式深度訪談的男人。另一部份是研究者在台北家事法庭時的紀錄本，共有37個案子被選取與分析。
研究結果如下：暴力男人有多個他們不自知的想法，包括因為他們身為先生，所以他們可以有特定想法與行為，第二是身為一個男人，他們可以有的想法與行為，第三是他們還是個大嬰孩，所以太太該如何對他們; 這些想法影響他們有知覺的感受，女人也有這些知覺的感受，這些感受包括困惑，他們認為他們做了一切該做的，可是情況還是一樣糟糕，第二是他們感受到的不屑與鄙視態度，第三是不公平的感受，最後一項是心死的感覺; 這些感受影響他們的婚姻互動，也就是覺得對方不可思議，所以在心理與身體上的離開，第二個互動是指他們疑惑自己對對方的愛為何都得不到相等的回應，第三個感受是他們不想對對方有任何的暴力相向，但是他們受不了不屑的口氣與表情; 這些不良的互動引發暴力的婚姻; 暴力發生時，夫妻需要問彼此還希不希望留住此婚姻關係，不論希望或不希望，尋求專業幫忙是好的方式，也就是如果夫妻自己不能解決問題，會建議專業協助的介入，而非親朋好友的介入。

關鍵字

暴力婚姻 ； 台灣/中國婚姻 ； 暴力男人

並列摘要

The purpose of this research is to understand the “violent men”, how they see their violent marriage and what do they have to say. And how one can find a way that both partners in a marriage can help their relationship. It is also the purpose to help professions to understand marital violence better so couple in trouble can be better supported and helped.
Information from in-depth interviews and researcher’s log are analyzed to present the views on violent marriages. There are two parts of this research, one is with the three participants’ in-depth interview and the second part is the log interpretation of the researcher on her 37 Taipei Family Court cases.
As the interpretation goes, violent men have some hidden messages going on in their mind that they are not aware of, those hidden messages lead to their feelings of being wronged. And the discomfort make them want to do more, however, the more doesn’t lead to the better, it often leads to heated or icy interactions between the couple, and finally, violence takes place.
After the marital conflicts take place, there is still hope that the couple can resolve their problems on their own. To ask themselves the question if they still want to stay married to each other is the first thing they can do. As a result, the couple have four answers. If they can’t help themselves, professional help is suggested.

並列關鍵字

violent marriage ； Taiwanese/Chinese marriage ； violent man

參考文獻

Peng, N.Y. 彭南元 (2003). 家事事件治療性審理方式初探—以離婚並涉及監護子女事件為例，律師雜誌8月號，(No. 287)。

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