「格格」不入：一個俠女社工行走社區江湖的自我敘事

A Chivalry Princess : The Self-Narrative of a Social Worker Working in the Community

顏采宜(Tsai-Yi Yen)

指導教授 ： 古允文

國立臺灣大學/社會科學院/社會工作學研究所/碩士(2017年)

https://doi.org/10.6342/NTU201701021

摘要

敘說我作為一位新手社工初入社區工作的歷程與反思，書寫我如何接觸社會福利、社會倡議、社會運動，但卻在這當中發現家庭的日常生活與所學知識的斷裂，並在認識許多多元的社工後對自我踏實感產生疑惑，便轉而走向社區，在社區移動我的身體與心裡貼近居民，撐出許多空間，像個行俠仗義的「俠女」，但在貼近過程中我與「有權者」的議題不斷浮現，總是容易與「有權者」起衝突，也總覺得自己是被壓迫的正義的一方，厭惡著權力的遊戲，像個不世故的「格格」。
書寫家族歷程時，才發現這樣的斷裂也同樣出現在我的生命歷程裡，直到看見家庭如何與體制、權力、政治委身與抗衡，而從藍領階級到資本家到知識分子的路程，方能理解「有權者」的姿態，並重新理解我的社會位置，看見我一直都不只是乾淨的「俠女」與「格格」，這樣與權力角逐的血脈一直都長在我身上，重新看見我也可以是個與「有權者」鬥爭著而不全然被壓迫的人，解放了我的斷裂，進而讓自己成為能夠游移在生活裡不同層次的自由之人。
書寫讓我成為更為柔軟的人，讓我重新理解選邊站為何總是讓我苦痛，讓我看見自己身上多元的血脈，以及身處在如此多元的社會，游移成為我生命重要的課題，而透過社區的磨練，讓我可以重新跟生命裡的草根精神相遇，更可以練習與不同姿態的人鬥著或結盟，我選擇走進一條要跟不同層次的人交手的江湖，那也是一條回家之路。

關鍵字

自我敘事 ； 社區 ； 權力 ； 社會工作 ； 貧窮

並列摘要

This is the reflection and course of myself as a new social worker working in a community, learning and finding the balance in between social welfare, social advocacy and social movement. Throughout the time being, the differences that I’ve experienced within the knowledge compared to the family of which I grew up in, caused me to start doubting myself as of who I am and what I’ve known throughout my life. This conflict within myself pushed me forward to work in the community. By working among and interacting with the residents, I felt like a “chivalry knight”. However, issues between me and the authorities emerged during my chivalrous acts. I’m constantly fighting with the authorities and feeling of myself as the rightful side being oppressed. I hated the game of power making me just seem more like an ignorant “princess”.
When narrating the course of my family, I realized the difference between me and the person who has power also appeared in the course of my family life. After understanding my family history of how they fought against the system, authority and political issues, in order to advance from blue-collar worker to bourgeoisie to intelligentsia, I started to understand the thinking of the people with power. Relocating my social position, I realized I am not just a “knight” and “princess”, but a “chivalrous” one who can fight against authority, it’s in my blood. After realizing my history, I was more able to liberate myself to living among the different social stratification.
Writing this thesis made me a softer person. Now, I can understand why I always feel pain when in need to choose sides. I can feel the multiple identities in my body and living among this diversified society, being able to move between the different class has become an important task in my life. Working in the community sharpens me as who I am, allowing me to realize my most essential self, hones my skills to fight against authorities and also to search for comrades down the same road. This, I believe, is my path home.

並列關鍵字

Self-narrative ； Community ； Authority ； Social work ； Poverty

參考文獻

方昱（2013）。我往那裡走，因為那裡看不見路：我的十年社工小革命。臺北市：時報文化出版企業股份有限公司。

成虹飛（2014）。行動／敘說探究與相遇的知識。課程與教學季刊，17(4)，01-26 頁。

夏林清（2004）。一盞夠用的燈：辨識發現的路徑。應用心理研究，第23 期，131-156 頁。

翁開誠（2002）。覺解我的治療理論與實踐：通過故事來成人之美。應用心理研究，第16 期，23-69 頁。

陶蕃瀛（2004）。行動研究：一種增強權能的助人工作方法。應用心理研究，第23 期，33-48 頁。