華人夫妻關係衝突之人我關係協調諮商改變歷程研究

Research on the changing process of Chinese married couples' self-relation coordination in marital counseling

范嵐欣(Lan-Hsin Fan)

指導教授 ： 陳秉華

國立臺灣師範大學/教育學院/教育心理與輔導學系/碩士(2009年)

摘要

本研究之目的，在探究現今台灣／華人社會文化變遷的脈絡下，在婚姻關係中感到有衝突之夫妻，透過一考量華人文化所設計之「婚姻關係衝突之人我協調」諮商介入方法的協助，夫妻如何達到各自之內在自我協調與夫妻關係協調，重回個人內在的平衡狀態與夫妻關係的平衡狀態。此諮商方法在設計上融入了陳秉華（Chen, 2005）「人我關係協調諮商模式」中重要的工作任務，與楊國樞（2004）「華人自我四元論」中四個自我的概念，以夫妻雙人共同參與之方式進行。
本研究之研究問題分別為：1.透過「婚姻關係衝突之人我協調」諮商介入方法，夫妻之關係衝突協調歷程為何？2.透過「婚姻關係衝突之人我協調」諮商介入方法，夫妻關係衝突協調的促成因素為何？3.婚姻關係衝突及其協調之文化理解與詮釋為何？
研究資料取自五對平均年齡34歲，婚齡約0.5～3.5年之夫妻，接受「婚姻關係衝突之人我協調」諮商介入方法所進行之夫妻關係衝突協調歷程；此諮商方法係安排於一4天之夫妻關係協調工作坊之中，每對夫妻進行時間約2小時。協調歷程經全程錄影錄音後，謄寫為逐字稿，採用質性研究紮根理論之開放編碼與主軸編碼方式進行資料分析，獲得夫妻關係衝突協調歷程及促成因素等研究結果；研究者亦從研究資料的分析中，整理出對研究參與夫妻之關係衝突及其協調所受之華人文化影響的理解與詮釋。研究結果發現：
一、夫妻關係衝突協調歷程
（一）協調初期夫妻之內在自我衝突：主要可分為「四個客體我之間」與「單一客體我之內」兩大類衝突。「四個客體我之間的衝突」包括：個人我與關係我的衝突、個人我與家庭我的衝突、個人我與社會我的衝突、關係我與家庭我的衝突、及「個人我＋關係我」與「家庭我＋社會我」的衝突；「單一客體我內的衝突」則包括了：個人我內的衝突、關係我內的衝突、家庭我內的衝突。
（二）協調初期夫妻之關係衝突：主要可分為兩類，一類衝突為來自夫妻雙方對四個自我之重視程度的差異，此同時意謂著夫妻雙方在傳統性與現代性心理特徵上之差異；另一類衝突則來自夫妻一方或雙方過於強調個人自我需求，忽略了對配偶或對關係的照顧所致。
（三）夫妻經歷之關係衝突協調歷程：五對夫妻皆透過「內在自我協調」以及「夫妻關係協調」兩種歷程逐步達成個人內在的平衡狀態與夫妻關係的平衡狀態；此兩種協調歷程交相影響，且皆為動態歷程；此動態平衡狀態會隨時因內在自我、夫妻關係、與外在環境的相互影響而有所變動。
（四）夫妻關係衝突協調的結果：五對夫妻呈現出「夫妻皆首重關係，也能盡量照顧到配偶之其他自我需求」的協調結果，雙方對此協調結果皆可接受，對彼此未來更好的關係發展有所期待，並有努力與採取實際行動之意願。
二、夫妻關係衝突協調的促成因素：共有十一個主要促成因素，分別為：1.增進對自我的覺察與瞭解；2.增進相互瞭解；3.訊息核對帶來對實際現況的瞭解與思考；4.雙方有共識；5.增進對夫妻關係的覺察與瞭解；6.增加對配偶之信任感；7.願意在關係中釋出善意／感受到配偶所釋出的善意；8.對改變願意承諾；9.期待建立新的溝通模式；10.期待持續成長並有努力意願；11幽默感。
三、研究者對夫妻關係衝突及其協調受華人文化影響之理解與詮釋：
（一）從衝突議題來看，傳統華人文化對當代華人夫妻仍具影響力，也影響夫妻雙方對「問題」有不同之意識程度。
（二）夫妻間傳統性與現代性心理特徵之差異可能帶來夫妻衝突，亦可能相互影響與改變，但改變仍有其限度。
（三）當代華人普遍呈現出傳統性與現代性心理特徵並存之現象，不同特徵間可能相互衝突、共存、或融合為一含納雙文化特徵之新心理特徵。
研究者根據研究結果，與相關文獻進行討論，文末說明本研究之研究限制，並根據研究發現，針對夫妻關係之衝突協調、夫妻關係衝突協調之諮商實務工作、夫妻關係衝突協調之未來相關研究提出建議。

關鍵字

婚姻諮商 ； 婚姻關係衝突 ； 人我關係協調諮商模式 ； 華人關係主義 ； 華人自我四元論 ； 諮商改變歷程

並列摘要

The purpose of this research was to explore how married couples in conflict achieve individual’s self-coordination and marital relationship coordination under the context of Taiwan/Chinese cultural transition through the intervention of ‘Self-relation Coordination in Marital Conflict Counseling’ to assist individuals return to the state of balance of inner harmony and marital relationship harmony. This counseling method integrates the counseling tasks of a counseling model of self-relation coordination (Chen, 2005) and the concept of the four Chinese selves of a four-part theory of the Chinese self (Yang, 2004).
The participants of this research were five married couples, have been married for a period of time from 0.5 to 3.5 years. The intervention of ‘Self-relation Coordination in Marital Conflict Counseling’ was implemented in a four-day workshop. Each married couple was involved in the counseling session for two hours. The coordination process was videotaped and transcribed. A qualitative approach using reference to open coding and axial coding in Grounded Theory was used to analyze the data. Results were obtained from the analyzed data and these include the married couples’ relational conflict coordination process and its facilitating components, as well as the researcher’s understanding and interpretation of the married couples’ conflicts and its coordination process under the influence of Chinese culture. The research findings are as follows:
1.Marital Conflict Coordination Process
a) Married couples’ inner self conflicts in the early stage of coordination can be categorized into two main types of conflicts: namely, conflicts “among four self-as-objects” and “within single self-as-object”. Conflicts “among four self-as-objects” include: conflicts between individual-oriented self and relationship-oriented self, conflicts between individual-oriented self and familistic-oriented self, conflicts between individual-oriented self and other-oriented self, conflicts between relationship-oriented self and familistic-oriented self, and conflicts between “individual-oriented self plus relationship-oriented self” and “familistic-oriented self plus other-oriented self”. Conflicts “within single self-as-object” include conflicts within individual-oriented self, conflicts within relationship-oriented self, and conflicts within familistic-oriented self.
b) Married couples’ relational conflicts in the early stage of coordination can be categorized into two main types. One type of conflicts comes from the differences of the importance level that couples place on the four selves, implying the differences that the couples have on traditionality and modernity. The other type of conflict comes from one side or both sides of the married couple overemphasizing on individual needs and neglecting the other spouse or their relationship.
c) Married couples’ relational conflict coordination process: all five married couples gradually achieved the balance of inner harmony and marital relationship harmony through both the self-coordination and marital relationship coordination processes. These two coordination processes interact with each other and both are dynamic processes. This dynamic balancing state is always changing in response to the interaction of inner self, marital relationship and environment.
d) The results of married couples’ relational conflict coordination process: all five married couples saw their marital relationship as the first priority and were able to take care of their spouses’ other individual needs to the best of their ability as the result of coordination. Both sides could accept such result and expected a better and improving relationship in the future with a willingness to take actions and strive for such goal.
2.Components that facilitate the married couples to coordinate in the relationship: the eleven main facilitating components include “enhancing awareness and understanding of self”, “enhancing mutual understanding”, “message verification that brings about understanding and thinking about the present situation”, “common consensus from both sides”, “enhancing awareness and understanding of marital relationship”, “having more trust in spouse”, “willing to show goodwill in the relationship/feeling spouse’s goodwill”, “willing to commit to change”, “expecting to establish new communication patterns”, “expecting to grow continuously and willing to strive for it”, and “sense of humor”.
3.The researcher’s understanding and interpretation of married couples’ conflict and its coordination under the influence of Chinese culture:
a)Looking at conflict issues, traditional Chinese culture still has its influence on the Chinese married couples in this generation, as well as on both spouses’ level of understanding on “problems”.
b)The differences of traditionality and modernity between the spouses could bring about conflicts and could also change and influence each other, though the change was limited.
c)Chinese in this generation generally display the characteristics of traditionality and modernity simultaneously. Different characteristics may be in conflict with one another, coexist, or blend into one new psychological characteristics consisting characteristics from both cultures.
Comparison of the findings in the current research with previous researches was made based on the research results. Limitations of the current study were discussed, and implications for future researches with regard to marital conflict coordination, martial conflict coordination counseling were proposed.

並列關鍵字

marital counseling ； marital conflict ； a counseling model of self-relation coordination ； Chinese relationalism ； a four-part theory of the Chinese self ； changing process in counseling

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