潛意識裡封閉的自我

潛意識指得是人的本能和被壓抑的那區塊，在慾望和本能有所衝突時，潛意識能夠給予、激發某種模糊定義的存在感，也被稱作一個正概念的反題。而筆者從潛意識來了解那封閉的自我，並由意識心理的層面，將之抒發於作品上。作品以家人為出發點，主要在探討筆者自我真實的地位、生命存在的意義；探討自己，探討人一生中有太多的外來影響、太多的面面俱到、稜稜角角、太多的假設、虛偽和太多不是自己想要的自我等；所以，想封閉自己回到潛意識裡，去探索最真實的自我。家庭，就像是筆者的核心課題，很本能的在創作中將心裡真實的印象表現出來，以一種自我心靈調整的狀態來探索，現代人整個思想內容，因受到週遭環境、道德等影響，改變了自我；所以，筆者以作品意圖反映出自我本能與內心裡潛意識與家庭的親密關係。作品以繪畫結合立體，呈現較愉悅的狀態，並盡量回歸於一種最直接、原始且開心的方式來呈現。作品以立體為主，材料為胚布及奇異筆、針線完成，布代表了與人不可分離的一面，以原始胚布代表最單純的想法；奇異筆則是直接不能修改擦拭、勇於呈現、直接了當的技法來完成創作，而一針一線的完成作品，想表達對家人孕育培養的辛勞及從小到大點點回憶。作品以每個階段延續內心所需，以自我內在為出發點，著重於個人主觀情感抒發，如記憶、幻想、心靈溝通等過程，筆者在創作上以探討與批判自身的態度了解個體在心靈上的情感與需求；透過創作讓筆者勇於面對親情面的情感表達，並忠實呈現自我內心的探索。

關鍵字

潛意識；家庭；自我；存在；封閉；繪畫結合立體；手縫

並列摘要

Sub-consciousness means human instinct and the inner part which is being suppressed; it also inspires some vague sense of existence when human desire contradicts instinct, and the contradiction leads to further reflection. The creator tries to perceive the self-isolated being from sub-consciousness level and express the result in the work from the perspective of consciousness. The creation is family-oriented which mainly focuses on the creator’s true status, the meaning of human existence, exploration of oneself, discovery of various unwanted outside influence, too much consideration, presumption and hypocrisy. Therefore, the creator tries to return to the state of sub-consciousness realm and investigate the true self. Family is the core theme in this creation which instinctively expresses it in the works to reflect the creator’s real mental image accompanied by self-adjustment. Contemporary thinking is greatly influenced by surroundings and moral standard that has changed people’s true selves. The work reflects the relationships between instinct and family closeness in one’s sub-consciousness level through the creation. The 3D drawing is presented in the most direct and original way to deliver a pleasant status of mind. The materials applied include raw fabrics, markers and needle works. Raw fabrics symbolize its inseparable part with people and hence, deliver the message of the most naïve thoughts. Markers cannot be corrected after applying it on the material which shows its characteristics of non-correction and daring to show. The laborious stitching represents the creator’s memories for family’s great efforts for raining up a child since childhood. The creation expresses the creator’s each mental stage and inner self which focuses on subjective mental expression, such as memories, fantasies, mental communication, etc. With constant exploration and self-judgment, the creator investigates individuals’ emotional needs and faithfully expresses the mental journey of self-exploration via direct confrontation with family affection.