是我做了什麼使上帝生氣?― 陳邑創作論述

What I did to that makes God angry? ― Chen Yi’s Art Work

陳邑(Chen, Yi)

指導教授 ： 謝鴻均

國立清華大學/藝術學院/藝術與設計學系所/碩士(2017年)

摘要

此篇論述以2011年至2017年之間的創作為主要對象，探討個人基督信仰與青春期情慾之矛盾狀態以及酷兒身分的自我認同，藉由精神分析的方法將夢境中的潛意識梳理，並透過聖像畫、超現實主義與微普普藝術的表現方式再現內在風景，透過角色的投射來探尋恥感的根源，並在懺悔之中同步進行自我反思。

第一章「緒論」說明研究動機、研究方法與研究內容。第二章「起源」，分別以基督宗教的教義、性慾望本能與酷兒、釋夢工作的啟發，來說明三者為我提供的創作養分。第三章「信仰與情慾的交融」，首先透過與參考藝術家的比較，來釐清自我創作元素中的形式脈絡，接著闡述碩士班過程中創作的系列作品內容理念，並探討侯俊明的創作形式與手法，研究如何透過儀式來連結慾望，將私密的意念用藝術表現。第四章「是我做了什麼讓天使生氣?」，以2017年的個展名稱為題，說明畢業製作系列作品的創作理念，透過天使代言自我內在的方式，將八年來的心路歷程凝縮再詮釋。最後在第五章「結論」中，將此篇論述以感性的方式進行總體分析，完成統整重點的書寫。

我透過此論述為創作進行完整的紀錄，除了抒發自身與社會的衝突情感，也更加在自我認同中獲得歸屬感。「寂寞」是我創作的本質，期許觀者能在與我作品交流的過程中感受到孤獨，進而喚起同理心來撫慰世界的脆弱，將上帝賜予的傷痛視為最美好的禮物，並以福音之名繼續傳頌。

關鍵字

基督信仰 ； 慾望 ； 夢 ； 身體 ； 恥感 ； 酷兒 ； 超現實 ； 微普普 ； 儀式

並列摘要

This essay focuses on works made between 2011 and 2017 which discuss the tension between my Christian faith and adolescent sexual desires, as well as my self-identification as queer. Adopting psychoanalysis as a tool, I explored the manifestations of my subconscious in dreams and represented my inner workings using religious icons, surrealism and micro-pop art to establish the source of shame via projections through the characters in these artworks. As I underwent this mode of confession and repentance, I also journeyed through a process of self-reflection.

Chapter One, the Introduction, shares my research motive, methodology, and content of my work. Chapter Two, Origins, discusses the doctrines of Christianity, sexual instincts and queer identity, and also insight I garnered from studies of the interpretation of dreams respectively, to illustrate the inspiration I drew from these three elements in order to fuel my creations. Chapter Three, the Meeting of Faith and Lust, first compares and analyzes the work of several artists to identify the direction and form that my own work would take. Next, this chapter discusses the concept behind the series of works I made during undergraduate period. Last but not least is a study of Hou Chun-Ming's creative works and approaches on how he connects art and sexual desires through ritualistic modes of expression to portray intimate passions. The title of Chapter Four, What did I do that makes Angels angry?, is the theme of my solo exhibition in March 2017. This chapter shares the concept behind the works presented in my graduation showcase, which condensed and reinterpreted the journey I have taken over these eight years, with my inner workings represented by angels and their voices. Finally, in Chapter Five, the Conclusion, an affective approach is adopted to provide an overall analysis of my work to sum up the key points discussed above.

This paper is a comprehensive report of my creative journey. Besides expressing the conflicts between society and I, the artwork allowed me to reinforce my self-identity and strengthen my sense of belonging to the queer community. "Loneliness" is the essence of my creations. It is my hope that viewers would experience a sense of loneliness as they interact with my art, which in turn awakens a sense of empathy in them to show compassion to the frangibility in the world. I also wish that viewers would perceive the pain that God bestowed upon us as a most wonderful gift, and continue to spread the gospel.

並列關鍵字

Christianity ； lust ； dream ； body ； shame ； queer ； surrealism ； micro-pop art ； ritual

參考文獻

●紀大偉，《感官世界》，臺北：聯合文學，2011

●紀大偉，《膜》，臺北：聯經出版，2011

●紀大偉，《同志文學史：台灣的發明》，臺北：聯經出版，2017

●張書榕，《波希繪畫的愚人研究》，國立成功大學藝術研究所碩士論文，2013

●卡爾‧榮格（C. G. Jung），《紅書》，（魯宓、劉宏信譯），臺北：心靈工坊，2016