記憶・情韻-朱慧芬繪畫創作研究

本創作研究是筆者在經歷人生重大困境後，於人生低谷時抱持沉潛態度，靜靜與自己的情緒陰影相處的心境轉化過程，並於創傷復原之後，以畫作記錄下這段記憶中的情感及對人生的體悟，將之發展成三大系列創作。在這段沉潛、復原及成長的過程中，筆者對人生有了種種體悟，筆者透過繪畫創作，療癒了自己，也有了重新出發的力量。筆者以「記憶・情韻」為專題研究，計有三大系列如下：沉潛階段的「大地情感系列」、復原階段的「人物情感系列」，以及成長階段的「省思議題系列」。在「大地情感系列」中，有筆者在困境初期，對希望之光極度渴求之期盼，並藉由對大地生生不息之描繪，燃起筆者內心等待光明來臨之希望。而「人物情感系列」則是描繪筆者在困境中期，對生命有另一番體悟，因而藉由對親友之描繪，傳達筆者對生命之體悟 ‐ 人生這一趟，只求「無悔」二字。至於「省思議題系列」，則是筆者走出困境後，將視野由個人情感，擴大至對社會議題之關懷的紀錄。由於這三大系列的作品是筆者在創傷復原之後，從記憶中再次回想而作，因此作品完成時間或有交錯之處。觀看筆者作品時，若依照沉潛階段的「大地情感系列」、復原階段的「人物情感系列」，以及成長階段的「省思議題系列」這三大系列之順序解讀筆者之情感發展，而忘卻其完成之時間順序，應可更理解筆者初逢困境、陷入困境，繼而步出困境之心境歷程。

關鍵字

記憶；情韻；創傷記憶；情緒陰影

並列摘要

This study sets out from the author's own suffering experiences that caused her a trauma memory. Nevertheless, the author healed her trauma memory by submerging emotions and getting along with her emotions shadow quietly for a long time until she regained the strength to move on with her new life. After the healing process, the author had some deepest realizations about life and expanded them for three series of creative artworks: “Emotional Series of the Earth”, “Emotional Series of the People” and “Rethinking Series of the World”. “Emotional Series of the Earth” describes the author’s extreme desires for hopes during the earliest stage of her suffering experience. “Emotional Series of the People” describes the author’s deepest realizations about life during the middle period of her suffering experience. “Rethinking Series of the World” describes the author’s cares of the world topics after she healed from her suffering experience. The author completed all of the creative artworks after she stepped out from her emotional trauma and recalled the healing process from her memory. Thus, some of these creative artworks were not completed in time order and should be viewed by the series order for understanding the author’s emotional process.